When you're Gwen, you are very soft and gentle.You spent a lot of time kissing and caressing. You seem toknow what I really love, where to touch me, where to kissme. Gary's gentle too, but it's different. He's morephysical. He does know what I like, but doesn't spend asmuch time doing things as Gwen does. Do I love the way theyboth make love to me? God yes. I couldn't ask for more.But, it's like you're two different people. A guy and agirl. But, when we consummate our love making it's all youand you make it so wonderful. You're the only guy that I'veever had, and I couldn't imagine anyone being any betterthan we are together." Gwen isn't a girl." I know. But, I think when you dress as Gwen you change. Ithink something, inside you, tells you that you're a girl,and you become as much of a girl as you can. Anne and Marysaw it the other day. They saw Gwen as a girl, not a guydressed as a girl. Mary told me that she couldn't get overhow feminine you were. It's like you're. I don’t know,” Paul stuttered nervously, wrapping himself tighter in Frankie’s dirty blanket.I stopped to study my colleague and he did the same to me. Our eyes locked and then I saw it... For fuck’s sake! He’s got that same goddamned look of trauma I’d seen in others who’d had close calls on the trails. I hated that look for it made a man useless to the rest of us.“It’s okay if you want to avoid the river,” I offered reassuringly. “Nobody will hold it against you, but you still have to pull your weight.”“I understand,” Paul said with his mouth but his body language sung a different tune.This filled me with concern for I’d been on cattle drives where men had close calls. In fact, on my last trip a drover fell off his horse and got trampled by the herd. Miraculously the poor bastard was unhurt but shook uncontrollably nonetheless and refused to go back out that afterwards. None of us knew what to do so we let him drive along in the goddamned Chuck Wagon.That had to be a mistake for.
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