Sarah caught the eye of Lady Rawlings and gave her a quick smile of greeting before moving to the side of the room. They both looked at the prison governor."John Gilbert, you have been found guilty of causing damage to public property while drunk and incapable. You have been sentenced to six strokes of the birch. Sentence will commence forthwith. Doctor Wallis is there any medical reason why sentence should not be carried out?" The governor looked across at Sarah."No governor." Sarah managed to say, hoping that she had managed to conceal the excitement she felt. The governor moved to Sarah's side and whispered."Will you take up your position." Sarah had read the instruction leaflet, which she had found in the medial officer's desk draw. It stated that the prisoner must be examined for heart rate, breathing and rupture after every stroke. Sarah stood in front of the young man. He was trembling visibly as he looked into her eyes with a pleading expression. Sarah kept her face impassive. . I guess.” “What are you afraid of?” “I honestly don’t know.” “Yes, you do. Tell me.” There is something pushy and controlling in the way she tells me this, and I don’t like it. I take a gulp of Chardonnay, wipe my mouth with a napkin and say: “I’m afraid of rejection. And I’m terrified of becoming a failure. My father expects me to succeed at all cost. He says he knows my full potential, but I’m not sure I believe him.” I put my face in my hands and let it all sink in. I hadn’t confessed this to anyone until now. I feel strange about having made this confession to someone I barely know. Amanda is silent. I say, “I have connections. I know someone who writes for the New York Observer. And I know that all I have to do is write an article and have it published. Become a freelancer or something. But I’m terrified of the outcome.” There’s an awkward pause. “Well,” Amanda ventures, “I know that most journalists start out as freelancers and make a lot of money that way. It surprises me.
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