"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Phil is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Phil."The entire congregation held its breath. "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."Dear Family & Friends,I am sorry that I have not been consistently responsive lately to your emails. I have been somewhat under the weather since my doctors informed me that I have an acute case of Post Islamic Stress Trauma with Apologetic Whitehouse Fatigue (PIST-AWF). For those of you who do not know what that is, PIST-AWF is a newly defined disease that is found to be widespread and highly contagious.Symptoms include, but may not be limited to: Severe pain of the scalp from pulling your own hair while viewing the President pander to Muslim. . , oh’s... , she was giving him told him he was accomplishing what he wanted. They were two tired puppies when they agreed to go to sleep.On a Friday in the early afternoon Steve was at the clinic. He thought the forecast was for a nice day tomorrow so he planned on golfing.In looking into the empty reception room he saw Paula, John Wilkinsing’s aunt, come in with another lady of close to the same age. Instead of their waiting for a nurse first before they saw a doctor he walked up to them and asked them what was wrong.Paula said, “This is Helen, John’s mother. She has been complaining about severe headaches so I thought we should come into see you. She didn’t want anything to eat or drink all day today.”John told Joyce facetiously to have the technician fire up the CT as he was coming up with a patient. He had Helen sit in a wheelchair and wheeled her to the elevator to go to the CT lab.As the scan was being done the tech said she would transmit the results to the radiologist on.
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