I mean, that’d be daft if say, Macarena or Who Let The Dogs Out reminded me of him. I’m just trying to laugh about it coz like, well…it’s not funny really. It’s horrible when you’re in love with your best mate.So yeah, I kissed him.Only lasted for a couple of seconds but it was like it lasted forever. I pulled myself away from him.Straight away I’m thinking: oh fuck. What have I done? Why did I go and do that? This could be the end of our beautiful friendship now. This changes everything.I couldn’t look my mate in the face. I just stood there looking at the ground.“There. I’ve done it now. Now you know how I feel about you.”I wouldn’t have done it if I was sober and now I wish I hadn’t done it. I waited for him to say something. He didn’t say nothing. I thought: fuck, that’s it. I’ve ruined everything. Our friendship was over. I wish I hadn’t kissed him now but I’d done it and there was fuck all I could do about it.I managed to look at him.“I’m sorry, mate. I shouldn’t have done. You enjoy being a man, right? Well do you think there mighteven be more fun and more happiness that could come your way if youexperienced something which you have never experienced before? The feelingsand the sensations I so much enjoy as a girl are things you have neverexperienced before. They just might be a new and wonderful experience whichcan create even more pleasure and happiness in the person I love so much,you. I would like to give those sensations and feelings to you, startingfirst thing in the morning. The cleaning can wait. I want to see if I canmake you even half as happy at being a girl as I am all the time."Are you willing to give it a try? I won't hurt you. I will make you feelfeminine and beautiful. New feelings for you. What can it hurt to try. Youdeserve all the happiness I can help you have." Please, Jim, for me, let me show you new things and new feelings and a newside of yourself which you just might like, a lot."Jim looked into my eyes deeply. For along time.
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