.. I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button.. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time, I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs.AWESOME!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave.Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target.I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and then thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to givethis thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as. Now go home and shower, because that envelope is for tonight.” At the door she gave my tush a squeeze and said, “You just remember, keep those clients happy, and you need not worry about mother’s business. OK?” and with a peck on the cheek, she ushered me out the door. I felt totally used.***The card had the address of a lady named Marlena. She was in her late 30’s, & a noted realtor in the area. Marlena’s house was tucked off the main highway that led thru this area. It was a nice spacious place. When Marlena came to the door she was blushing and already looked embarrassed. I smiled and walked into her living room. Marlena was a very attractive Hispanic lady. The card had said Marlena had a bit of a fetish where she likes to be dominated by a man, and she was apparently feeling intimidated, looking at the floor and barely speaking loud enough for me to hear her. So I told her in a strong commanding voice, “You know why I’m here?”In a quiet almost meek manner, “yes”“So go upstairs.
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