"Hang on a minute, not quite done" she said, as she then got out a lip-gloss and generously applied that too.Next thing, she'd got hold of my wig and had placed it on my head. Shereached for a hairbrush and began styling it."Quite a pretty girl, aren't we. Now, we need some earrings to finishyou off. Where are those clip-ons of mine...."? She found them on herdresser and clipped them to my ears."Voila," she said proudly, "you make a good woman, Simon. Hang on,no, I can't call you that now you're this pretty. How about Suzie?Yes, that's a good name for a maid. Suzie it is." C'mon darling," I said, "this is all going a bit far. A joke's ajoke, OK? Can't we just say you've had your little laugh and I cantake this lot off again?" No way, Jose. If you wanna play dress up while I'm out, you can do itwhilst I'm here and I'll get a clean house into the bargain too. Nowstand up and stop whining."I stood up. There was no way she was going to give in any of this; Iknew I had to see. ”I put up my hand; their voices fell but they kept staring like I was going to disappear right before their eyes for my next trick. This had to stop.“I’m just a guy, a nerd, actually, who’s studied a few martial arts moves and got lucky. I didn’t do anything that any of you couldn’t learn, but it takes a few years of study. Lots of people do it. I just have the build that makes it look easy, but it’s just learned muscle reactions, like playing an instrument. Any of you play?” Two raised their hands. “Ok, how long did it take before your playing sounded ok?” Two years, they both allowed. “Right. That’s just about how long it took me to begin to get some proficiency. So no big deal, right? Nothing but eye-muscle automatic response, when you see a note on the page, you don’t think where to put your fingers, yes? They go to the right place without any thought. That’s how my skill is too. Nothing heroic.”They still looked at me dubiously. I gotta change the subject. Before I could, Sarah.
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