This was all old hat. But now I knew now that itwasn't mine. Now I could see it in contrast to what I should look like,that mousy little bespeckled thing that seemed so long ago now, from backbefore that stupid device.Wait. Wait. I could remember that. Fuck, I could remember everything. Iscreamed and cried and laughed all at once. I stared in the mirror. Oh mygod.How are you supposed to feel when you realize that your best friend -your only friend - used your reality-altering super weapon to not onlysteal your boyfriend, but to make it so that you had never even dated inthe first place? How are you supposed to feel when you see how completelythey've ruined your life? When it finally hits how deep the humiliationruns?Half of me wanted to scream, the other half wanted to curl up into a balland cry. A third half of me was just relieved that I was, at the veryleast, me again. I had survived. Well, okay, I wasn't quite whollyintact, but here I was nonetheless. I was back and I knew what. .. it wasn't something you could ever get used to."Right... so now that you have it why back out? Are you frightened?" Ally finally broke the silence."No. She only said it to stop me last night. I can't force her to do something she doesn't really want to do. She wouldn't break her word once she'd given it." So you did at least tell her you still wanted to go, right? You didn't just call it off." What?" Marcus, you can be so thick for a smart guy sometimes." Nick told him, unable to keep from smiling gently. "You told her not to feel obliged, right, and that was the right thing to do, fair enough... but that doesn't mean that you can't go at all." Ask her, honey." Ally put in, as they pulled into their street. "I saw how she looked at you today. She never used to look at you like that." That's the way she looked at the guys at uni." He put in. "I don't want to be just another roll in the sack, I think that'd probably hurt more than not really being anything at all." Then don't be a.
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