That night we went into the ‘lively’ part of town for a drink and some food. Jon told me that I wouldn’t have to worry about my dress blowing up. What he didn’t tell me until just before we went out was that I had to wear my lacy dress, the one with thousands of holes that looks quite normal until you get close-up when you realise that you can see everything through it. Well it was dark outside. Jon said that we weren’t going to drink much that night so we took the car. We walked the last bit and soon found ourselves in this noisy area with someone outside each bar trying to talk us into going in. We went into one on the street side that that had a TV playing a Chubby Brown video. Jon had heard his voice and said, “We’re going in there.” We spent the next hour laughing at some brilliant but filthy jokes; it was great. From there we went into a rather bright McDonalds and had a burger. One or two people (men) looked at me but there again there were a few other young girls wearing. My formative years got spent in a small town where I was initially considered a tomboy. Later, during my high school years, the possibility that I could become a lesbian got considered. When parents came to understand my situation and took me to see the appropriate experts, no one knew about my hormone treatments to deal with my ‘dilemma.’ As one would imagine, these were difficult years, but somehow I muddled through them. It was clear to me that not only did I want to be a man, but that I was attracted to them.I was greatly relieved upon finally attending a faraway college after school. My life did not become much easier, but at least I was finally able to live as a man.As one would imagine, however, this was complicated. I was not able to shower with the males, nor, understandably, able to use a urinal. As you would imagine, I had to be very cautious and could not expose myself to even the most appealing individuals at college. After jumbling through varsity, where I am pleased to.
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