Indistinct. His own fears? Betrayal.It was past midnight when I cleaned my supplies. I’d done it again—let my emotions take me into the canvas. This time with no music score. The last one, Desperate Love, I’d sent to the vault while it was still wet. So different from my usual painting that it could be by a different artist. I’d captured something different. In addition to shape and color and shadow, I’d captured the emotion missing in my other paintings. I flopped down in my chair to look at it, wondering what time I had to be in class in the morning. I looked at my Day-Timer and groaned as I realized I had a paper due for Bychkova at eleven o’clock. I opened my laptop and stared at my new painting, and began to write.I ran home in the morning to shower and change clothes after having slept in the studio chair the remainder of the night. Kate had an early class and was already gone. Melody and Lissa were on their way out the door with the boys, all of whom I hugged, kissed and. I guess that's why my girlfriend was so upset when I broke it off with her.I hooked up randomly with a few other girls through the rest of the year. All of them had done something very different than the other and I liked it all. I was in control the last few times because of the lack of that for my first time.The stupid virginity-taking bitch.It was about a week before my 19th birthday. I remember my mom coming into my room to get my laundry from my hamper basket. It seemed normal and I felt the same as always. She came in and rolled her eyes at the mess on my floor and the dirty dishes on my nightstand. I kept my eyes on my TV, ignoring her like the norm."How many times do I have to tell you, Kale," she started complaining when she reached my hamper, "clean your room." I will, calm down," I told her, not looking away from my TV.She had grabbed my remote from beside me on the bed and switched the TV off. "Now!" She yelled after picking up my basket of dirty clothes and leaving my.
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