Mandy stayed close to me on the love seat;Rita and Darryl sat on either end of the couch. We chatted abouttrivial things, like the happenings at school, and what had beenhappening with music, movies and television. I mostly listened, sinceI'd been out of all that for so long. We were soon called to thedining room for our lunch. Unlike everyone else I ate sparingly. Thefood tasted very nice; I got my favorites: tomato soup and a grilledcheese sandwich, but since coming out of the drug withdrawals I'dcompletely lost interest in eating. It simply no longer had any appealto me; I rarely felt hungry anymore and ate only when I was told to, orfelt I had to.We all continued to chat about meaningless things. I realized thatthey were all pointedly avoiding asking me about my time in Portland.With the courage I'd discovered in myself through my ordeals I decidedthat it had to be out in the open, in keeping with Mom's statement of"no more secrets" in our family. I felt a wave of. The big circular bed under a mirrored ceiling in his bedroom, too. I'd never quite had the nerve to decorate my own apartment the same way. The nerve, or the ready cash.The gas log in the fireplace was lit in spite of the morning's warmth. He'd always been a nut about fires. All his life they'd fascinated him, and on picnics or at the beach he could always get one going quicker and better than anyone else."You said you had a problem." I fixed my usual rum and coke, watched his hands shake as he poured a double shot of bourbon over the ice in his glass. "Now that I've had a look at you I can believe it. You look like you've been roasted over a slow fire." Don't say that!" He twitched all over and poured his drink down in one gulp. It was the first time I'd seen him look nervous since our first year of high school. Even back then he'd been the cool one, never flustered. Making a wide detour around the fireplace he went back to the bar and fixed another drink, this time not bothering.
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