" I say, still trying to wrap my head around what'shappening."Do you still need to shave?" Dad asks."Uh, yes, actually!" I say, before wondering when I became enthusiasticabout shaving- the one male activity I hated the most. "I'm getting lasertreatments on my face to remove facial hair..." ...But they've not had a full effect yet," dad says. "Okay, your shavingkit can stay for now. Was going to get you a new one for Christmas, guessthat'll have to be a Ladyshave or a waxing kit instead!" Yeah," I whisper as dad starts gathering up all the sports-relatedornaments and posters on my shelves and walls. Previously, I couldn'thave cared less about them, but now, I want more than anything to grabthem out of dad's hands so that I could have them just one second longer..."I've called your brothers," mum says, returning to my bedroom with awide grin on her face."Wh-what?" I ask with terror in my voice."Don't worry, I didn't tell them outright," mum says. "I know that'ssomething you'll want to. Colleges were back as an option. They said no baby, no reason to stay married. Divorce has been talked up as if it was something that was wonderful. I feel sorry for Jake and I still want the best for him.I have finally agreed to everything except the divorce. Jake didn't find out until after I agreed, but I made a pact and swore on the Bible that I wouldn't live with Jake if his parents would pay for his education. I wouldn't see him for a long time, either. I still want to be Mrs. Jacob Hanson even if we don't live together. My parents have finally agreed to those conditions and to send me to school. I applied and have been accepted. Jake has been accepted to some school out west. We are now headed in different directions to the opposite sides of the country.We have had so little time to talk before we left each other. I think at that moment I was most sane for the first time since I lost our baby. Before that, I know at times I couldn't even remember who I was. I tried to muddle.
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