Running away from her wounds would build a wall between his love for her and her acceptance of his love, would root their relationship in a lie. In Ed MacCarley’s world, lies were the foundation of hatred and violence, of recrimination and accusation. ‘You know I love you, don’t you, Sara?’ She nodded her head. ‘Eddie, I’ve thought about this a lot, what I feel for you, what I think you feel for me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt these things before, Eddie, so I don’t know what it’s supposed to feel like. But I know how I feel when I’m with you. I know that when I’m with you I feel like the world is going to be alright, that I am going to be OK. I feel all warm inside, Eddie, does that make sense?’ He nodded his head. Yes, it did very much. ‘If you feel anything like what it is I feel, then I know you love me,’ she said as she squeezed his hand and looked away, not wanting him to see her tears again. Always ashamed. Always afraid. Had it not been for a prayer? * They crossed a very. "Because she's angry," I sighed. "Angry at me for choosing to live likethis." Becca nodded as I tried to explain grandma's point of view, but itwas clear that as much as she understood the words our grandmother said,she would never understand exactly why she said them."That's- that's just revolting," Jamie spits as I drive the two of us toEmma's house. "Using a ten year old girl as a weapon against you? That-that's- ugh!" It wasn't long before Becca was old enough to understand exactly whatgrandma was doing," I sigh. "So in her determination to drive away onegrandchild, she ended up losing two... She only barely speaks to mum anymore, only started talking to Emma again after she got pregnant..." This is why I steer clear of all religion," Jamie snorts."Oh, I don't blame religion," I say. "I mean, I've got no special lovefor it, but grandma's a piss-poor Christian, always has been. Neverdonates to charity, thinks poor people are all scroungers- even those whowork full-time- HATES.
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