Two feet away was another machine with a sign that read,"Manicures, $20.00." Why not?" thought the salesman. He paid the money, inserted his hands into the slot, and the machine started to buzz and whirl. Fifteen seconds later he pulled out his hands and they were perfectly manicured.The next machine had a sign that read, "This machine provides a service men need when away from their wives, 50 cents."The salesman looked both ways, put fifty cents in the machine, unzipped his fly, and with some anticipation, stuck his manhood into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of agony and almost passed out. Fifteen seconds later it shut off.With trembling hands, the salesman was able to withdraw his tender unit ... which now had a button sewn neatly on the end.Stuttering ProblemA guy walks into his doctor's office and says, "Ddddoc, I've bbbeen sssttttuttering ffor yyears and III'm tired of it. Ccccan yyyou hehehelp mmme???"The doc says, "Well, I'll have to. Penelope stood motionless for a few seconds and finally said, "Jasmine, I'm going to ask you this one time. Do you agree to continue today's lesson?"Jack hung his head and said, "No, Miss Penelope. I'm sorry."Penelope reached down and yanked Jack to his feet. She said, "Get out of this house." Jack looked around the room. "Now."Jack said, "But what about..." Now! Did you hear me?" She shoved him. "Out. Out of this room. Out of this house. Out. Out. Out." She shoved him through the door. She walked over to the window and after a few moments she saw Jack come out of the front door, still dressed in his schoolgirl uniform. The skirt was still hiked up a little bit and his socks were askew. He got to the sidewalk and looked first down one way and then down the opposite way. Seeming to pick one at random, he slowly shuffled away from the sorority house.Penelope said, "The nerve of some people." People in the audience started making noise and rustling around. "I'm sorry, people, it looks.
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