He looked around. He was still in the hospital. In his short life he’d already had enough of hospitals. According to the whiteboard on the wall across from his bed, Nurse Anne was his keeper for the day and it was Thursday – so it had been four days. Fortunately, he’d recovered quickly enough that he’d been moved out of intensive care after two days. Feeling better, he was impatient to get out and back to work, and back to his own bed in the quiet of his room above the gun shop. Hospitals were anything but quiet restful places. He looked at the bouquets, balloons, and even Christmas decorations in his room. It was surprising. Did he even know that many people?And what about Christmas? He’d been deployed somewhere the last four, and truthfully, he’d not missed it. Christmas was about joy and family. He had experienced little of the former, and had none of the latter.When Ed Bailey had visited yesterday afternoon, he assured James that everything was being covered, but James knew. Well I can't explain it either.What happened a few minutes after I saw Chris leave is that I became aware that I didn't sense him! He was gone, I knew he wasn't dead, but he wasn't there.I've learned through my therapy-- about the only thing useful from my therapy-- that Chris probably went into what is called a fugue state. It similar to dissociative amnesia, and it sort of means that the body continues to act on auto pilot but the mind has taken a vacation to a dark place.I was now worried sick. I called and his cell went to voice mail. I left a message asking where he was and if he was okay.I can't tell you how scared I was. I was trembling, and I was disoriented, but I somehow managed to make it to our room. I collapsed on my bed, a bed I knew I'd never share with my husband.It was about an hour or so before I mustered enough pride and anger to put an end to my pity party. King was going to pay! I'd told him what I was going to do, now I needed to figure out how I was going to do.
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