How many thin mints do you have to eat before they start working?My wife just stopped and said, “You weren’t even listening, were you?”I thought to myself, “That’s a pretty weird way to start a conversation.”Mr. Rogers did not adequately prepare me for the people in my neighborhood.If stupidity were a disability, I know a few people who’d be getting monthly checks... You know you’re getting old when you can’t walk past a bathroom without thinking, “I might as well pee, as long as I’m here”.Pharmacist to a customer: “Sir, please understand, to buy an anti-depression pill you need a proper prescription ... Simply showing your marriage certificate and your wife’s picture is not enough.”A bookseller conducting a market survey asked a woman “Which book has helped you most in your life?”The woman replied, “My husband’s check book”“Political Correctness is just fascism pretending to be manners”—George CarlinMary Poppins, you’re under arrest for Supercallifragilisticsextrafficking.“And with. So, I waited.Finally, she said, “We are an old people, Michael. And the sword’s history goes back to the beginning of our time and the very first of our people who lived on Tapato. Part of my responsibility as queen, is to pass those stories of our beginning on to the heir. I began telling them to Mikeya and Ileana when they were young. As did my mother to me. The stories have been passed from mother to daughter for many generations.”Kalani stopped, hesitating. I nodded for her to continue.“Many, many years ago, so the story goes, a strange young man was washed ashore, wearing those items. He claimed that his ship, a mighty ship, had been lost at sea, and he had floated on an unusual piece of his ship for many days before being washed ashore on Tapato. He was just at death’s door when Tejuan-li, who was the first queen, found him on the beach and nursed the strange young man back to health.“He appeared to look like us, but he was not Tapatoan. After questioning him at length, they.
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