Sitting close to them and feeling their soft lips onmy neck and their big hands between my legs, was like discovering mynervous and muscular systems for the first time. Black men helped meovercome so many stupid inhibitions I had about nudity and intimacy andpenetration. And I learned how to really strengthen and stretch themuscles in my throat and anus and vagina. It was a bit demeaning at firstto be passed around from player to player like an inflatable sex doll.But I figure that was the least I could do to help overcome centuries ofwhite oppression. And after a year of hanging out with a limp-wristed,weak-kneed, runny nose wimp like you, being the plaything of hard-bodied,domineering men felt sinfully good.MOM: Uh-oh, here come the waterworks. Willow, stop that crying or you'llruin the professional makeup design we got for you at the salon. That'sright, dear, gently dab, don't wipe, with your lacy pink hankie. Ofcourse, it's true that Dr. Pamela said that a good cry once a day. We need to talk Ian," I said. I needed to tell someone about this and Ian was the closest thing I had to a best friend around here."No Cameron. I do not want to talk about your shit." Hehehe, no, not about that," I said, "Uh, you see, last night something kinda trippy happened that I really can't explain. You won't believe this shit dude, but it's true, I swear." Ian looked straight into my eyes with a look of compassion."You're pregnant aren't you?"You are such an asshole," I joked, "but seriously, you won't believe what I've gone through this morning." So you're not pregnant?" he continued, "You know I was starting to wonder with that ever-extending belly of yours." Ian smiled wide. "You've been smoking too much. Those munchies are gonna catch up to you, fatty." This had been an ongoing joke of his. My old body weighed 160 lbs. I was, if anything, under my ideal bodyweight but Ian always called me fat and shit. It never really bothered me though. In fact, I thought it was pretty.
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