Trust becomes difficult when it has been repeatedly betrayed. Was your trust betrayed, Kenny?" I've never had any trust. I don't know why. Maybe it was just the orphanage, but I learned at a very young age not to trust anyone except myself. I grew up expecting people to try to force me to do what they wanted. They didn't care about what I wanted." Don't you accept that they were acting in what they believed was your best interest?" No, because I'd tell them what I wanted, but they kept telling me I had to do what they wanted. They said that God wanted it that way." There are rules that we all try to live by, Kenny. Some are established through religious beliefs, some from government edict, but most are compromises that society has ordained, to ensure levels of acceptable conduct, in order to provide for a fair and safe living environment for all of us." I know most of those rules, but that isn't what I meant. Part of it was the religious stuff, but a lot of it was just them wanting. "Michael! I said to touch, not molest me!What's gotten into you? Really! We have to have a long talk later. I'mexhausted and filthy, I'm taking a long, hot shower then having a nap.We'll discuss your behavior later."And with that Jeri flounced out of my room. I heard him go into thebathroom and close the door. I sat on the bed and put my head in myhands. My God, what was I thinking? I have it good here, it's a greatsetup for me, why would I go and blow it by making a pass at mylandlord? And he's a guy, for goodness' sake! Was I having a breakdown?Was the split with my wife catching up with me? I tried to come to mysenses, shaking my head and telling myself off for my outrageousfondling of Jeri. What's wrong with me?I finally pulled myself together enough to stand up and get myself aglass of water. I trudged back to my bedroom but couldn't get into mywork. I was so stupid! Why would I risk screwing up this deal? Idecided that I'd have to sincerely apologize to Jeri and hope that.
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