But when I compared how Eric and I had gravitated towards each other to how I felt about Leanne, I realized my feeling towards Leanne weren’t that deep. There was no real chemistry between us, just the experience we had had together.That weekend was very difficult for me, especially watching her lose herself in the sex she had with some of my dad’s male employees on Sunday.Leanne and I met the next morning for what was to be our last official breakfast together. I admit I was still having a tough time keeping my fondness for her from interfering in what I knew was best. In Leanne’s case, the best was for her to go out and discover what she wanted for herself instead of depending on me to guide her any longer.She, of course, had other ideas, insisting that she immediately start the physical conditioning my mother had undergone. I strongly considered extending our time together by putting her through the conditioning myself. The problem was, she really was starting to depend on me more. Twenty-seven years of comfort and understanding. When we get home there is a flurry of activity. Put the cat out, lock the doors, turn out the lights, make sure the coffee is ready to brew first thing in the morning. Before long we’re in the bedroom. I brush my teeth and while she’s busy in the bathroom I put on some silk boxer shorts but ask her to stay dressed. Taking her into my arms, we kiss and I slowly dance her to the foot of the bed and have her kick off her shoes. While she does that I go into the spare room and get the free standing full length mirror. I place it so Ann can see herself from head to foot. I’m pleased to see she has also removed her earrings. Standing behind her I breathe into her ear and whisper, ‘Watch what I’m doing, don’t look at me. Look at my hands, feel what they’re doing but don’t watch me.’ From her shoulders my hands slide up into her hair. Her eyes droop closed as I massage her scalp. ‘Keep your eyes open. Watch .’ My hands come down softly.
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