I can’t believe I lost my virginity to my Dad. But with who? I remember coming home early last night. How is that possible? I remember seeing the clock on the microwave as I walked by the kitchen. It was 10:36 PM. Not late at all. I’m pretty sure I had sex after that but that only leaves one possibility. Dad was in the living room when I came home. He was waiting up for me fuming mad. The memories are start to slide into place but it doesn’t make sense. . . “Are you drunk? Oh my god Ashley. . .I can’t believe this,” Dad roars as I stumble into the living room. “I let you out of my sight for two hours and you come home plastered!?!” I don’t really know how to respond. I’m not even sure how this happened. I only had two drinks before I started feeling really silly. Then Sarah, my best friend, gave me a ride home. Sarah’s almost 17 and we were hanging out with some of her high school friends. Sarah was worried that something had happened, that I drank too much or that something was. If Claudia wasn't regularly serviced this weekend, she was going to put on another couple of feet up top. By the look of poor old Davie, he couldn't handle much more of this."Is she off coffee?" I asked when I could get him alone for a second."Only since last night. How long before the effect wears off?" Dunno! We've never tried. Could be a day or so. It might be a couple of months, in which case those things'll be the size of a house. Don't worry, it could be worse. I'm not sure how, but they could be worse. At the moment, I was trying not to imagine the effect on a particular bunch of schoolgirls who won't leave that coffee alone. I am scared to go back to Skingsley for fear of what they will look like!" Schoolkids? How old?" Davie has always had a soft spot for school uniforms."Eleven, the youngest, just fourteen the oldest." Omigod!" he muttered faintly.By that evening, all three women had expanded by varying amounts: Louise the least, although she had reached 50 inches. Jessica.
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