His mother caught him last year, innocently standingwith his trousers round his ankles in a country parkmen’s convenience, being masturbated by a man in his40’s. She is quite laid back, his mum, and althoughobviously not prepared to see him tossed off by a manof that age, just shouted at the guy, pulled up herson’s trousers and left with him trailing behind her. She told me Bradley had an amused, dreamy look on hisface whilst the man was fondling him, and although notan active participant, was not in the least bothered byhis adult molester.Anyway, back to my own contribution to his education…We (that’s me and my little sister Lizzie, who is 22)have been acting as Bradley’s unofficial babysitterssince we were old enough to be left alone, and we havegone through the usual “show me yours, and I’ll showyou mine” bit several times. The first time wasprobably when I was 21 and Lizzie 20. It only consistedof she and I dropping our pyjama. With approval she noticed my check marks on the beer mats but told me that they were unnecessary. The first drinks would be on the house. She excused herself to go and freshen up. She did smell rather strongly. The heady aroma of a healthy, sweaty woman in her prime.An energetic banging of pots and pans coming from the darker recesses of the inn alerted us to our rumbling stomachs. There was no need for a menu. The now clean and glowing hostess told us that a pork roast was almost ready. Would we like some soup, another drink? Yes to both. What followed was one of the minor miracles which do happen all too rarely. The soup was an excellent clear broth with slivers of carrot, leeks, celery, parsley and tiny chunks of fried beef, deliciously spiced. The roast was everything one could desire. Succulent, a lovely beer crust, the cuts sufficiently generous, huge yeast dumplings, a creamy dark sauce, some dressed lettuce. Simple German country fare at its best, so seldom found nowadays.
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