Tom had watched exchanges at the fort, and knew that the faster the gun is used, the longer that the person lived. He was sure that John was faster than any white man that he had ever seen. He nodded, and John dropped it back into the holster.Tom asked how they had become so good at using the pistols in so short of a time. John smiled and said that it was not so short, as Gray Eagle had them practicing with them for more than three years. Ben spoke for the first time when he said, "The first year was just learning to shoot, but the second we didn't even have shot, as all we learned was to get it out faster than anybody else. But the worst was the last year, then we had to draw and shoot, and hit what we were supposed to, and some of the things that Gray Eagle wanted us to hit got pretty small, and pretty far away." John still had a disgusted look on his face as he said that it was easy to kill with it, but that there was no honor. Tom nodded his head showing that he understood. Then. .." The strain in her voice and the tears in her eyes said the rest.I kissed her hand and in a gentle voice said, "Amber, and Angela, the important thing is that you realize that what you have been feeling is not sick, or twisted, or anything else that you thought. There is nothing wrong with you. You just learned the truth in a very bad way. This actually can work to our benefit in your current situation. It can make it easier for you to hide by allowing you to be Amber without feeling like you have to stop being Angela, do you understand all of that?" Yes," she said, eyes downcast and averted."Good, now based on what you have learned, what do you need?" I don't ... I don't know." There was an overwhelming sense of hopelessness in her voice. She didn't believe that it was possible."Yes you do. This is not a story in a book, but put yourself in Phèdre's place. What was Delaunay to her?"Her head dropped almost to her chest, "He was her master." Yes, he was her master, not in the way we.
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