Actually, I’m almost two years older because he just turned seventeen a couple of months ago, and I’ll be nineteen in less than two months. I was nine and Derek eight when our father was killed in a car crash. They said he was drunk, and I can believe it. He was drunk a lot of times. He didn’t have any insurance, and we’d never had much money anyway, so we were in kind of a tight place. In the following years we lived in a lot of rundown motel rooms. Once we slept in our car, until it was repossessed. Sometimes we went to shelters, but we never stayed long because our mom was afraid some social worker would decide to take Derek and me from her. She wasn’t about to let that happen. She was always very protective of us. She often said we were all she had. She worked, but usually at jobs that didn’t last too long, and none that paid very well. So it was tough, but I’m sure tougher on her than on us. We were kids and we’d never had much, so we didn’t miss much. If we weren’t hungry we. Already turning and moving away, she grumbles, “Yeah.”She finds a seat toward the end of the subway car and plunks herself down. Sliding to the inside seat, shoulder against the wall with her back to the other passengers, she drops her bag on the other seat beside her and readjusts her earphones. It’s the best she can do to barricade herself from the rest of the world at this point.She grimaces trying not to think if the seat feels and smells uncomfortably moist and musty because of her or because of its numerous, previous occupants. In the end, it doesn’t really matter. Finally, she’s going home. Checking her phone, she notes the time, “10:30 p.m.”, then sighs and turns the volume up on her jazz music before putting it away. She looks aside at the vague nothingness passing by the window as the train passes through the tunnel and adds to a seemingly endless supply of weary sighs.What a fucking day.What a fucking evening.Crushed by deadlines at work, she knew before the start of the.
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