My next task was to clear as much of the alternate riverbed as I could. I waded into the cold water and cleared away as much brush and undergrowth that had grown while the river had remained in its normal course as I could before I lost feeling in my legs. I gave up on the idea of taking down the small trees that had grown as well. Cutting them in two feet of cold water was just not going to happen.After nine days of work, I was ready to try to move both the upstream and the downstream gates. I put a rope around the free side of the upstream gate and applied a little force. I moved it just enough to get it partially open into the rivers flow ... and to break the thing. Now I had water running into both channels! I sat on the side of the river wondering what to do when Opal Anne came out, bringing me water and a venison sandwich.“How’s the project going, Paul?”“I think I broke the gate. This is going to be rough.”Opal Anne looked at the situation with the gate being partially open and. He then began to dig a grave with the shovel.Astonished, I got back into bed.My wife said, "Darling, you're shaking, what is it?" You'll never believe what I've just seen!" I said, "That tosser next door has still got my bloody shovel."A man is seeking to join the Vancouver Police force. The Sergeant doing the interview says:"Your qualifications all look good, but there is an attitude suitability test that you must take before you can be accepted." Then, sliding a pistol and a box of ammo across the desk, he says: "Take this pistol and go out and shoot six illegal immigrants, six drug dealers, six activists, and a rabbit."The man being interviewed asks, "Why the rabbit?" Excellent!" says the Sergeant. "When can you start?"From the 'Shy One'Performance Evaluation comments:1) "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."2) "I would not allow this employee to breed."3) "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't.
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