And that only made worse my anxieties. He did not understand. It was not just a glass; it was my life shattering. I felt in danger.The night before, I left the $50 dollars in the legging of my stockings. After my husband left, I went to the bedroom and took it out and held it in my hands and thought to myself, I am a puta! Oh my god. This is very bad.I put the green bills to my nose and I could smell my pussy and the semen of those two cocks. I had opened my legs to a whore monger, and then to his u******e son! Oh my god. This is very bad, I kept thinking. I was crazy with a new d**g. I was crazy!I put the bills separate from my other money in my purse, in a rubber band. I thought, I will go to that boy and throw at him his money and tell him that I am not a whore! But then I thought, I worked too hard for this money. In fact, he owes me more. He got me too cheap! The little bastard. To be fucking with a nasty u******e boy, I should be paid $500! Not fifty!Now he will always laugh at. .. not all of it, but part of it." You could have spoken to me about this, you know... I'm not... I'm not that bad, am I?" NO!... I'm sorry it took this long. I didn't really work out the rest until today. Well, I didn't really work it out at all... Marcus did." What?" Look... they don't discharge you for five years after... when there's been no signs." I know, my aunt had a bone tumour. She didn't need... But she still had all the radiotherapy and stuff." Well... you sort of set that five year mark as the 'I'm cured' date... until then... it's just in the back of your head that you're on borrowed time. I didn't think I was ready yet to drop that on someone." But... the club... you... we..." I was just... getting to know people, I guess. Getting back into it. Tony thinks I've been dating for the last two years, but I've not been letting myself get close to anyone... I thought this would be a new start — university... it's been more of the same." Has it?" Elspeth leant forward, trying.
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