“When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.”The two boys looked at each other, nodded and then gave the ten dollars to the teacher.An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of the building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said:“Corned beef and cabbage. If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I’m going to jump off this building.”The Mexican opened his lunch box again and exclaimed “Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I’m going to jump too.”The blond guy opened his lunch and said “Bologna again! If I get one more bologna sandwich one more time I’m also going to jump.”The next day the Irishman opened his lunch, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death. The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito and leaped off the scaffold. The blond guy opened his lunch, saw bologna again and leaped to his death also.At the funeral the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said “If I’d. " Sir, I'll run straight away and tell the master," one of them went togo."Don't bother," I told them, "it was your master that did it."After that they said no more, just went round tidying up the debris andrunning a bath for me. I could see through the en suite door that themaid there was about to put bath salts or something similar in thewater."Don't put anything in it," I called out, "I prefer plain water rightnow."I wandered naked into the bathroom and locked the door. I looked in themedicine cabinet and found what I'd hoped for, a pair of scissors. Theywere only very small but they did the job I wanted although only slowly.I hacked all my hair off, very raggedly but in several places closeenough to the scalp to make it bleed. Then I lay down in the hot waterand with considerable pain but determination, I used it to slash mywrists.I was aware of some knocking on the door, then it went away and so didI, drifting without pain.Unfortunately I woke up in the bed I'd been given in.
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