It’s good to see you.’ And it was. ‘Came home for the weekend for a friend’s birthday,’ she explained, then swept her arm to indicate her two companions standing a few yards away, ‘That’s Suey, the birthday girl….’ She pointed to a rather attractive Chinese girl,’ then leaned in to whisper, ‘The other one who looks like Miss Piggy, is my cousin Bethany….we got stuck with her for the night.’ The poor bitch really did look like a Muppet, she was huge all round with legs like tree trunks and was dressed in a long bright pink quilted anorak with pink fun fur trim. I shuddered with the thought of meeting that on a blind date…if she got one of those legs over you, you would not be getting up in a hurry! We hugged again and she started to move off towards her friends, ‘See you next week I called! Then on a whim, ‘Call me at home, if you fancy doing anything tomorrow?’ Saturday was my day off, that week. ‘Yes, OK,’ she called back as they walked away, ‘that would be great…we can do some. Perhaps that is just a metaphor for my marriage. For five years I have been married to a wonderful and talented, strong willed goddess. For the first three years sex wasn’t just sex, I used to call in sick to work just to stay home and in bed, or the kitchen, bathroom and ect… Then my wife miscarried and we were past devastated. Of course I threw myself into work. Staying late and stressing over new accounts seemed to be the only thing that would calm my aches. My wife didn’t work, I provided enough to live very well so she wouldn’t have to, and think that’s what hurt her the most. She had all the day to think about it and never healed. Halfway into the forth year and we were fighting everyday. I was never home, she never left the house and that amazing sex… stopped altogether. Finally one day my wife broke down. ‘Jon,’ words pushing through the sobs, ‘I can’t be here anymore.’ ‘What? How do you mean?’ ‘All day long I sit here watching TV then I go upstairs and exercise..
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