I know I must choose. Power or continued pain. The feeling of the universal creation flowing through my body would be as sweet as any kiss, as intoxicating as any liquor, yet I fear it. I fear what temptations I would have, I could undo the separation. I could heal myself. Become whole. Yet, within my soul, I know that that option is not. The flow of self-depreciating sadness moving across each numb nerve with the quiet coldness of ice, numbing my heart to what I have been part of, have seen. As tempting, in its own way, as the power I could open myself to. I choose. There really was not much of a choice, the decision made in an instant. I rein in my mind and flow, not outward as a waterfall, but inward, sinking into the black hole that is the remnant of my heart. Darkness swallows me yet I ignore it, I search. Moving across surfaces that reek of memory and sadness, I begin the long road through a self-made hell. Heat tears at my atoms, Cold sears my neutrons from balance, both. ” There was a large mirror on closet door. “Watch me fuck you,” I continued. “I love the way your big tits hang, you fucking cum slut.” Again, I didn’t wait. I came inside her a minute later.I pulled out and slapped her on the ass. “Go get cleaned up,” I told her. “I’m tired.” She got up off the bed. I smiled at her and nodded. She knew what I meant. She smiled back and mouthed, “I love you.” She turned and left the room.A couple minutes later, I heard her say, “Don’t worry, he’s asleep. Come on...Fuck me.” There was a pause and then, “Oh, God yes, fuck me with that big dick.” For the next hour, the sounds of sex emanated from the room. I heard Carole announce her orgasm several times before he almost yelled out about his. The two of them fell to the bed, panting. “God that was great,” she told him. “Thank you.”A moment later, I heard him say, “Oh, yeah...” I knew what was happening. She was sucking his cock clean. “God, you are good at that,” he moaned.I drifted off to sleep when the.
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