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The doctor anxiously asked, “Well, did it work?”The messenger boy says, “Big fart, no chief!”How To Get Hired At WalmartA manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, the interviewer asked, ‘What is the fastest thing you know of?’The first man replied, ‘A THOUGHT.’ It just pops into your head. There’s no warning.‘That’s very good!’ replied the interviewer. ‘And, now you sir?’, he asked the second man.‘Hmmm ... let me see ‘A blink! It comes and goes and you don’t know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.’‘Excellent!’ said the interviewer. ‘The blink of an eye, that’s a very popular cliché for speed.’ He then turned to the third man, who was contemplating. ” “The drummer?” “Nope. He's Tim. Slow has been playing the bass in bars for thirty years or so. He's not really our front man. Our singer quit to get married.” “Married people can't sing?” she asked. “Her husband didn't want her hanging out in sleazy bars with a bunch of drunken reprobates like Slow. Can't really blame him.” “He doesn't trust her?” “No. Not in the least.” “Isn't the bar closing?” “No. Mac keeps it open until one. He's got nowhere else to be I guess.” “Do you?” she asked. He reached over and took her left hand in his, held the fingers up. “Not really,” he said. “You play lead?” “Sort of,” she said. “Not as good as you.” “Pretty good callouses,” he said as he examined her finger tips. “What do you have?” “Rickenbacker 340,” she said. “But it's in the shop.” “What's wrong with it?” “I meant the pawn shop,” she said. “Gonna be able to get it out?” “I hope,” she said. She would be getting it out, of course. Even if she had to rob somebody to do it. Even if she had to fuck.
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