It would take a few years before she would be done with all the medical work and they still weren't sure how she would look.I knew I still had to go back in and say goodbye. I wiped the tears from my eyes as I walked back in the room to say goodbye to my best friend. I know she could see that I had been crying. She was always such a smart girl. She had both the looks and the brains. I had to ask "Why God? Why Kerry?"I could tell she was looking at me. "John, don't worry about me and I want you to go out there and be the best football player ever. If you don't want to do it for yourself, then do it for me. I don't know how I will look after all the operations, but just remember that beauty is only skin deep and I will still be the same person on the inside."I had always talked with Kerry telling her how I wanted to play pro football and make lots of money and she could spend it on herself and our kids. I was basing all my future plans on us being together. Now the only plan I had was. I mean millions, billions of women have done it and most probablyenjoyed it so why shouldn't I?" That's my girl, Carli! I'm pretty darn sure you will love it," shesaid.After we had our hugs and pecks on cheeks I left for home humming andskipping all the way. If I would have known the words I would have sung"I enjoy being a girl!" After I got home to my sorry-looking home,though, I felt a little empty inside. My whole world turned around sinceI went to Room 01 but that was over now. I was on my own now. The onlysure thing was I decided to drop out of school. I mean, what am I goingto do with a degree in English Lit? The $10,000 check would help me getsettled somewhere and get busy finding a husband or, at least, a spermdonor, I hoped, so I was on the computer looking for different options.I needed to find work somewhere to support myself. I thought of offeringmyself as a surrogate mother but the thought of carrying a baby for 9months and then have it taken away was too much.
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