Annie sat back down, grateful for the one friend she had.“You ready to go Annie?” Nat poked her head into Nat’s office. Annie popped out of her chair, grabbed her purse, and was at the door in what seemed like half a second. They walked out of the building and into the city street, street lights clicking on and taxis honking. They sat down in a nearly empty theatre screening a horror movie. Annie was comfortable with scary movies, but if that’s what Nat wanted to watch, Annie would muddle through. Nat offered her hand to Annie to squeeze once the gore started, and Annie soon began hugging Nat’s whole arm in fear. Nat lifted her other arm and began to stroke Annie’s hair, something her ex-boyfriend used to do when they were in bed and the thunder and lightning was terrible. The chainsaws in the movie started whirring, and the characters started screaming. Annie was burying her head in Nat’s shoulder, surrounded by Nat’s perfume, and Annie’s other arm reaching over to Nat’s other. My life had been a solitary one, dominated by my work and my music. My music, how long had it been since I had had time for that? It was half a year after they had moved in that she dropped the bomb. She had headaches often, sometimes even migraine attacks, then she started vomiting without feeling sick beforehand. She downplayed the episodes for a while, but when I confronted her and told her to see a doctor, she suddenly cracked open and spilled her guts. There was no need for her to see a doctor, as she already had the diagnosis: A large, lethal brain tumour, inoperable, unlikely to be affected by chemo or radiation treatment, which she had refused up to that day. I was shocked, helpless and a little bit angry that she hadn’t told me before, also that she had refused treatment. I couldn’t understand why she didn’t, even when she said that it would probably buy her another half year at the most. No one who has not lived through this agony with a family member can understand what I.
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