" I'm not sure where you are going, Chris." You need to resolve that conflict, one way or another. If you don't, it will tear you apart and, who knows, the next time you try to kill yourself, you may succeed. And there will be a next time," Chris replied."How do I do that?" I asked."Let me make a phone call. You go and get dressed."I went to the guest room and took my top off. Something was nagging me, something I'd forgotten."Shit, must have a wash," I thought.You forget these simple things when you haven't been able to do them for so long.I went to the bathroom and had a wash. I looked round for a deodorant and, finding a new one, used it.Back in the guest room I started to get dressed. Cotton knickers, pop socks, jeans and a T-shirt, they were a bit loose, but were okay. The shoes, flat heel court shoes, were a little tight, but wearable."Chris," I said after walking into the living room, "any chance of a bra?" You want one?" Chris asked, smiling."Yes. I'd feel happier wearing. I felt awkward, why she gave condoms, did she know that I am going to stay with Impana?I didn’t mind and reached Impana home. She had taken a bath and was wearing a salwar. As usual, it covered her body fully. We had dinner, she had prepared mudde and uppsaru. While having dinner she was sad. Then after dinner, we started watching TV for some time.She lay her head on my shoulder while watching TV. I made my self comfortable for her to rest on my shoulder. We didn’t have any dirty thoughts till then. She broke the silence and told, I will sleep. I told ok about that. She told you can watch TV till you want and then come to sleep.I said it’s ok. I’ll sleep here. She said I am feeling sad so you come to the room when you want to sleep. She went to the room and closed the door. After 5 minutes she opened the door and slept. The bed was visible from the place I sat.Impana: How much time will you watch TV?Me: 5 minutes, I’ll come.Then I switched off the TV and went to the room. She had.
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