He approves of my being responsible and protecting myself. He’d like me not to be so boy crazy, but he is also a realist. He’s known me all my life, so he knows it’s better to be prepared than to have unrealistic expectations when it comes to my judgment and self-control.”The doctor frowned and said, “Sometimes there are actions that can bring more dishonor than even an unplanned pregnancy. While it is commendable that you are preventing pregnancy, you should try not to shame your father. After all, you would be homeless, naked, and hungry if it was not for your father.”I tried to look chastened, and in Japanese, I said, roughly the equivalent of, “I will try not to be wild, because I never want to cause my father any shame.”She nodded her head and told me to do my best.When I joined daddy in the waiting room, I smiled and bowed to him. He looked puzzled, but he bowed back.We took the train back home. I slept with my head on daddy’s shoulder for most of the trip.When we got back to. It felt strange to me, but it didn't even bother me that he was dead. It seemed the same with Bev. I thought maybe this was how my sister felt when my wish for her not to be able to talk of this place or my abilities kicked in. Like there should be something there, I should be doing something about this but I didn't. The two of us did what tests we could to verify what we saw was true, then accepted it. Both of us had done youth CPR courses yet neither of us thought to apply it.When she took the mirror away, Bev said, "I guess we should cover him up."I helped her with his sleeping bag, draping it over him, including his face.We got our own bags and spread them out in our alcove. We zipped down one side, across the bottom and a couple of feet up, leaving an opening for us to get in when we were ready. It was mid afternoon and was still light enough to see. I put the radio-light outside to get some sun while Bev started the water going for more coffee. We took our cups back to our.
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