"The officer pulled two rubber gloves out of a box and put them on. Hepicked up a small flashlight, a tongue depressor and walked over to me."Open."He searched my mouth."Arms up."He searched my armpits."Bend over and spread your legs."I hesitated."You might as well get used to it," he advised me. "When you're inprison and somebody's bitch, this will be routine, except it will besomething bigger than my finger. Now bend over."The other officer tapped his nightstick against his hand menacingly.Great, I thought to myself. Way to hallucinate Pet. Well, at leastI'll finally get to be somebody's girlfriend. I guess that's a step upfrom dating myself and I'll save a bundle on batteries too. With theofficer scowling at me, I complied and got the male equivalent of agynecological exam. Then again I thought, as I felt him probing,having one opening to inspect is better than having two."He's clean," the examining officer announced and they both snickered. Obviously, a standard joke for. There was nogoing back unless I filed them off down to my natural nail. I was usedto this for long weekends at home wearing gel nails for extended periodsof time; I wasn't used to wearing long bright red nails at the airport.Baggage claim wasn't so bad; I actually received a nice compliment fromthe woman working the counter. It was the TSA line that intimidated methe most. Not the TSA personnel, just the line itself. Walking back andforth around the turnstiles in the queue, parading past the same peopleover and over again on both sides. No one said anything but I could feelthe stares.Looking back, I would have thought the three hour plane ride would havebeen an opportunity where nerves might come into play. But I was able torelax and enjoy the flight while reading and watching some videos. Ithad been my first chance to relax since two days ago with everything Ihad to do getting ready to leave for my trip.After the plane landed it was rush, rush, rush, all over again. I had.
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