There was no improvement in Ralph's condition, and in fact, he seemed to be wasting away before our very eyes. I said nothing to him or to Deb about my observations, but it was impossible to believe they didn't see what I could see. He was very weak after his treatments now, eating nothing at all and sleeping more than waking during the day.When I brought him into my home in May, he thanked me as he always did and collapsed into the easy chair. He seemed to be trying to summon some strength, but it wasn't there to be found."I'm dying, Ian. I don't know how much longer I can stand the chemotherapy. I'm almost at the stage when I should tell them to stop and let the disease take its course. Strangely, I'm not afraid of dying. I thought I would be, but that's not how I feel. It will almost be a gift. A release for Sharon and Deborah. I've been a burden to them and to you. I'm sorry about that, but I appreciate what everyone has tried to do to help me. I know it's been hard on you all.. I said “we will have to get some clothes and put petrol in the car” she got up and put her T shirt on, her bra she had in her hand, her skirt was up by my car, and I watched a snow white bottom shining in the sun because it was still soaking wet from the Lager, she said where is your shorts, she picked them up in the kitchen, I put on a clean T shirt she came over and put my small knob in her mouth and after about two or three minutes, kissed him and said you have got a lot more of that to come just wait and see, I love sex with you. Tammy got my shorts and her bra and pissed over both of them and put them by the fridge, she said “they will know who they are from and what has happened, let’s go and get some of my things and go please” she said “don’t worry about getting your money from the bank, we can do that over there, I have nine hundred pound in my bag because I could never go back to that wife beater again”.We got in the car and had one last look at the lawn where only half.
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