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We wanted to get away from all the out of towners. Earl and Sam and I were playing pool and drinking. The subject of girls came up and we all agreed that it had been too long since any of us had gotten laid. The bar was empty. Three white women came in and sat at the bar, they were petite and in their late sixties or early seventies and not bad looking for their age. they came over and wanted to play. We were all having a good time and getting a buzz on. They were getting nasty with the more they drunk. They had said that they were from out of town and their husbands were at some meeting. Earl whispered to me that we could nail these women easily and I agreed but I thought they were too old. Sam chimed in that we could poke them now and hit the bars for some younger tail afterwards. We all agreed and asked the women if they would like to go to our house and smoke some weed. They said yes and we were there in two minutes. Sam was on the couch with Mary-she had blonde hair and looked. If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they’d eventually find me attractive.2. I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom, until they’re flashing behind you.3. Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.4. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.5. I’m great at multi-tasking--I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.6. If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.7. Take my advice - I’m not using it.8. My wife and I were happy for twenty years; then we met.9. Hospitality is the art of making guests feel like they’re at home when you wish they were.10. Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.11. Ever stop to think and forget to start again?12. Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.13. He who laughs last thinks slowest.14. Is it wrong.
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