Then I said a little more loudly, “Mardina, I have to talk to Doctor Winkerson. I’ll be right back.”I slipped out of the cubicle and spoke to the guard at the door. She said something into her radio and a moment later the doctor stepped into the room.“What is your concern?” he asked.“You are showing the reflected activity from his brain rather than the injected feed,” I said. “Since he already has memories of these events, that will be a combination of both his and the victim’s memories.”“We are aware of that,” he said looking down at me. The tone of his voice and his body language told me he was thinking of me as a bewildered child that he could pat on the head and send back to play in my room. “But it should make no difference,” he said smugly.“Maybe the victims won’t think the same way,” I said firmly.“The Senator and I thought it would be best this way,” he said flippantly and turned and left the room.“Asshole,” I said quietly.The guard shook her head slowly and said even more. The deal is, you're crying in your beer and suffering alone and she's dancing."A new image of my ex flashed in my head. I could see her, smell her perfume, and hear her laugh. It was far away from the sobbing wretch that I left, but the sexy manipulating force of nature she was. Well, so much for my revenge. I wondered if she had felt any of the torment and loss that had plagued me since the night we parted. I said nothing as I hung my head, lost in my thoughts. The grief that I had been trying to repress rushed over me. I was powerless to stop it. I was glad Fred was there. I felt ... I felt an overwhelming sense of mourning for what was dead and gone. Fred understood what was happening to me."Now, what I'm about to say may sound a bit hard, but you have got to suck it up, Jake. Your situation has changed and you have to change with it. That's all you need to know. Grow up ... Get your body back in shape, move on. On your feet, soldier ... March or die ... The answers to your.
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