The sick feeling in my stomach traveled up my throat in a line of burning acid. ‘I sent a few letters to Joel.’ I confessed hating myself for it. I didn’t want to talk to her about this. ‘Nine years ago, Dillon Marie.’ My face must have shown something, I was betting shock because she replied with, ‘Yeah, he told me about them. He tells me everything.’ She ended very pointedly. ‘He didn’t say you were engaged. I should have known, it would explain how very upset he was.’ She resumed cooking but I knew it wasn’t over. ‘I can’t believe he told you.’ I said. ‘I don’t know why he’s even upset, it’s been ten years.’ That was a lie. ‘ I have every right to have found someone else.’ Even to me it sounded defensive. I didn’t want to be defensive. I shouldn’t have to be. But I did, I wanted to grovel, beg for her forgiveness, but I’m above all that right? My mind flashed to waking up next to Joel, feeling sorry, weak and afraid. Pathetic. I was becoming pathetic. She froze. ‘I was hoping. “He won’t be here as expected.”“I understand that, we have another job on Saturday night. We need to be there because the ‘show must go on.’ Sarah and Nevina, I understand if you can’t or don’t want to join us every time.”“Now, just a minute, Mr. Love,” my future mother-in-law said. “I enjoyed last night very much, and I consider myself part of the Love Family Singers. Your mother and I want to be at every gig there is. We are through having and raising young children. You all proved that last night, that each and every one of you are so talented and full of love and caring.”“Do you feel that same way, Sarah?” I asked directly.“Not since being in a sorority, have I felt like I belonged somewhere. I am alongside my best friend Nevina, and my sons and her daughters,” she said.“If we had performed a full third hour, we would’ve run out of music last night,” I said. “I’m open and welcome to either new music or more of the oldies we mostly did last night.”“I agree with my future husband,”.
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