‘PUT ME ON SPEAKER PHONE NOW. THEN WAIT UNTIL I TALK.’ I hear a couple of buttons being pressed then the wonderful echo of speaker phone radiated from the phone. ‘Are you both ready? YES OR NO ANSWERS ONLY.’ I hear two muted yes answers. ‘NUMBER 1. NO ONE HERE IS HURT. UNDERSTAND? YES OR NO ONLY’ I hear two relieved yes answers. ‘NUMBER 2. WE HIT A STORM AND HAD TO WAIT IT OUT FOR A DAY. UNDERSTAND? YES OR NO ONLY’ I hear two more relieved yes answers. ‘NUMBER 3. The cell phones at the car were drained. I dropped the car charger in a puddle. We showed up here at the ER in a little town on the way home because we had to go to the washroom and try to plug in for a recharge. There’s no cell phone coverage in the boonies. We’re going to see if we can hit their cafeteria for something to eat. ok? Wait before you talk. Wait a minute, Bill just got back from the can. Here he is and it’s my turn to go. Bye’ Relieving myself in a real bathroom was a treat after a week on the river. The. One might say I am just a fuckin’ drunk. I see myself as somewhere between a Wild Turkey and Four Roses; stuck between jobs, reality, and pipe dreams. Knowing my own strengths and weaknesses of opium. At times drifting into the underworld of prostitution's seediness.At the moment, I was on a retainer to find Sadie, a Schnauzer with an attitude, which was missing from my landlord's menagerie. The little fucker was an ankle biter and I had a pair of argyles with holes to prove it. Also, I think I inherited the mutt's fleas.It was hot in the city and the oscillating fan was just stirring up ashes and dreams as I looked up from the crossword puzzle. There was a beginning of a shadow beneath the office door; the office atop a noodle factory in the steamy garment district adjacent to the bordellos. No one spoke English, including my secretary who had just given me her notice. Leaving with her steno pad and my old Remington typewriter.Then a knock. I was thinking it could be my ex looking.
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