There were too many questions ,too may 'hows'.At times they were answered by my mom but in parts.The answers created more doubts and to one question ,no one could answer 'how does it feel'. Even now my vocabulary is limited as to express how does it feel.Thus the tenacious teen age were spent in trying to find these answers.It was during these times that I learnt to touch myself and enjoy.My mind went back in time when,my coach tried to satisfy my inquisitiveness.I had learnt a lesson then,being obvious about my intent would land me in trouble.I learnt to say no.I learnt to preserve myself. I learnt to control myself.I understood one thing it was is my best interest to be in control rather than give it to others.I had decided If i had to do i would decide with whom and where and how.While I shrouded myself with the calmness of peace and simplicity at my heart lay raging emotions of sexual fantasy just as the serene pacific ocean appears peaceful yet shrouds violent volcanoes. That little asshole, that fucking prick downloaded my website and my stories there. I guess it took him 8 days to get up the nerve to hit me with it all.Get this, the little shit told me this morning that if I don't convince his father (my brother) to let him transfer here and live with Peter and me, he will tell Peter about my writings, my girlfriend, and my weekly gang-bangs. He actually followed me Last week and took pictures of me going into my friend's place and all the men that arrived. He had a picture of me after I got home. I knew he had a Laptop when he arrived; I had no idea how sophisticated his is. He put one of those tiny little cameras under my Computer table aimed up at my crotch. He told me he got the idea from my story "Blackmailed" anyway as most of you know when ever I come home from a night of sex I am always up, wide awake and I have sex on the brain. I normally sit down, write, read e-mails, and look at pictures of Glory-holes or cartoons. Normally I will sit.
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