"I said I'm a god. The sort with a little g. Although trust me, sweetie, there's not much else that's little about me." The puppet absently dusted off the sleeves of its rumpled jacket with the back of its gloved wooden hands. "Anyway, the people that you call the Mayans used to worship me – well, the ones that knew how to party did, anyway. Those were the days ... temple orgies, playing with virgins, ritual sacrifices ... man, I miss that shit. Good times." So what happened?"The Amazing Bartleby shrugged his small wooden shoulders. "The usual. There was a misunderstanding, some other gods who couldn't take a joke got mad, and..." The puppet made a twirling motion with his gloved hands. "Boom. Ala-kazam-presto, I got trapped inside a wooden idol. Trapped for all eternity, said my divine brothers, as they imprisoned me." I see." Tejal pushed her digital recorder a little closer to the wooden marionette. "You don't seem particularly trapped anymore, though." Oh, that's all thanks to. "Did you come here to stare at me or do you need something?" she said in a soft contralto that made him shiver."I--Um--Need an upgrade on my ship's 'puter," he stammered, trying to regain his composure. "Ops told me you were the one to see. I didn't expect to see--a woman," he finished, grinning sheepishly."The 'Mike' threw you off, huh?" she replied and laughed. "I get that a lot. It's short for Michaela, but that sounds so stuffy. What level of upgrade are you looking for and what model of 'puter is it?" "Forty terabytes and it's a Planck Mk. VII," he replied. "Would you have time to take a look at it?" "That's one of the systems installed in the old Tri-Planet War Fleet models. What are you doing with one of those hulks?" "I plan on using it to transport Polonium ore from Mercury to the thermoelectric power stations. The Tri-Planets are offering top dollar for all they can get." "Polonium, no kidding, that stuff is so hot only robots can handle it and their systems fail after.
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