"For starters, I'll have a Vodka Martini, molested; not stirred." What?" asked the man."Do I have to explain your business to you, you bleeedin' Yank?! Take the shaker, fill it with vodka, add a splash of dry vermouth, give the shaker to those two bimbos with the ridiculously large breasts, have them stick it between their cleavages, pull their bodies close to each other and have them jump up and down for five minutes. Then make them smoke a bloody cigarette." I'm sorry, sir. State law prevents smoking in all..." OK, they can dispense with the fags then." What?" The bloody cigarettes!" I groaned. "Have them make out that way instead." OK, then that would make them 'female fags'," he laughed."Whatever," I said, not really in the mood for his somewhat amusing observation.When he turned his back, I walked over to my target. She was holding court with a bunch of men who were all fondling her mammoth mammary marsupials."Please come with me," I said taking her arm."What the fuck?!" yelled. That would be kind of fun. I just hoped Shirley didn't butcher my hair. Tim loved my hair long and deep orange. I knew I would lose 'hot' points going shoulder length and almost blonde. However, it was the middle of a Florida summer. And I'm a firm believer that no chick looks hot in a ponytail.Monday morning I was nervous. It was a shock to see my hair at my shoulders. Then the dye job began. I was confused about highlights. Shirley told me it would look 'more natural.' When she turned me around and I saw myself, I was shocked. I looked totally different. I looked fucking hot. My hair had this curly bounce. I hugged her and told her it was perfect. I checked myself out in the mirror. I wore the white blouse first. My tits looked huge. I asked Shirley 'do I look to slutty to go work at an eleementary school?' She told me she would've worn shorts two inches shorter, a tank top and heels. She wasn't joking. Shirley was the queen of looking slutty. So I went to work. I was a ball of.
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