I was the one who held you on the ground for an hour, knowing you were hours gone, cradling your head in stone silence, a whole god damned hour, before I finally burst into tears thinking about what had happened. I couldn’t bring myself to call the ambulance, it was only when Kelly walked in, when her screaming started, that I snapped out and was able to. Why did you do it Scott? Why did you have to go and do this? Since then, I’ve found myself sitting there in quiet moments, reflecting on the times when we were younger, all different time periods, randomized, never in order. I guess that’s how the human brain works, one thought flowing into another, never quite making sense yet making perfect sense to the person doing the thinking. I think about things like the time we were young and did ‘Little Athletics’ together, the times we would ride our bikes around the park together, play on the swings, hang off the monkey bars, things like that. I think about the times we’d be riding our. At the convent school she'd fallen in love with an older girl who just used her trust to enable easier domination for the nuns, a fact she only learnt later. A few years after her escape she read that the girl was found murdered in a muddy ditch in the north of France. By then Angique had fallen in love with the woman who led a business where she was an intern and came to work after fashion school. She was Swedish and very dominant. She was also a sex addict who was reported missing on a business trip in Bangkok, Thailand. They found her in a demented state, lying naked in a landfill outside the city. Angique twice visited her in a mental hospital in her native country before admitting the woman she'd fallen in love with was gone. Another love lost, another trust shattered.It was at this moment that Angique decided to be nobody's toy ever again. From then on she herself would be the one toying. She'd be the one hardening her heart against soft feelings. She decided to reduce men to.
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