I want to go into a dither about this. It’s part of what a date is supposed to be about. Don’t try to make it easy for me, because it’s not supposed to be easy. It’s supposed to be like a minor crisis, and then magically turn into something wonderful that I can recall over and over the next day and the day after that. You’re expecting me to take this in stride, but that’s not how it’s supposed to be. I’m supposed to feel like Cinderella!’ ‘Okay, Cinderella. I’ll come by to pick you up Thursday evening at seven. I’ll be driving a pumpkin.’ The first date doesn’t work out as planned Zero Mostel made a fortune starring in a Broadway play called ‘A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum.’ I’m reminded of that title when I think back to picking up Sherry for our date, because a funny thing happened on the way to the restaurant. I rang her doorbell and she came to the door, all ready to go, even to her purse. She looked amazing. I mean, we’re no kids, but she could have had. To get right to the point, I had been accepted into the fraternity and all that was left was the formality of the initiation. I'd heard it was a real doozy--very different from what any other frat put you through. But I wasn't too nervous about it. So you get your ass paddled or some such juvenile shit. No big deal. There were fifteen of us new pledges and I figured I could stand anything the other guys could.So came the night and we all gathered at the frat house. We went through a lot of bullshit rituals at first--bowing down-- reciting sacred pledges--signing our names in blood--and so on. But what was all what I expected more or less.What came afterwards was the gas! They sat us down and said we had passed all tests so far and now we were going to be entertained."We got a young pig here from the Brass Cat," the man said. That was a downtown striptease bar that most of us were too young to be allowed into. "This pretty little pig is going to dance for your enjoyment and education,.
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