If you can give me a new reason for speeding – a reason I've never before heard – I'll let you go..."The old gentleman paused then said, "Thirty three years ago, my wife ran off with a policeman;I thought you were bringing her back." Have a good day, Sir," replied the copper.QueenslandThe owner of a golf course on the Gold Coast was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.He called her into his office and said,"You graduated from the University of Queensland and I need some help. If I was to give you$20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"The secretary thought a moment, and then replied,"Everything but my earrings."TasmaniaA senior citizen in Tasmania was overheard saying,"When the end of the world comes, I hope to be here."When asked why, he replied,"I'd rather be in Tasmania 'cause everything happens in Tasmania 20 years later than in the rest of the world."Northern TerritoryThe young man from NT came running into the. The feeling of nylon against her bare skin was wickedly exciting; she wished Dick were here.She had sat down at the window writing desk and had begun writing a long chatty letter to Marylou when there was a knock on the door. "Come in," she called, thinking it was the maid returning for the dinner dishes."Good evening, my dear," Lord Medwell said, coming in and closing the door behind him. He stood there for a moment, staring appreciatively at her gown, then carried a large manila envelope to the table in front of the fireplace.She felt the first discordant notes of uneasiness run through her mind. Lord Medwell had walked in as though he owned the place. He had looked at her in an unmistakable superior manner. Vaguely she felt that it was not right that he should be in a closed room with her when her husband was absent, especially with her dressed as revealingly as she was."Writing letters, I see," he said, quite unnecessarily."Yes. To a few friends back home. Mother. Cousin... you.
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