Our son Gribbled was adorable, and, even at only six months old, all indications were he would turn out to be one smart fella.Because they wanted to keep it a surprise, we had to minimize the number of workers we allowed on Nat-a-gee and swear them to secrecy. It took a little over a year to raise crops, reassemble buildings and make Nat-a-gee inhabitable again.During that time, I worked on improving my design and occasionally threw in some ideas of my own on how we should go about revealing to that world, and thus everyone in the galaxy, what we’d been doing. When it was finally time for the grand unveiling of the new and improved Nat-a-gee, we came up with a cover story of how, because of limited resources, we were going to have to move a large number of the Nat-a-geeian’s to a new location. Certainly, this caused quite a stir, but the Consensus was adamant, having been secretly advised as to what we were really doing.We gathered the majority of the Nat-a-gee currently living on. I could only hope because my team was in the midst of a terrible losing streak. Finally, Lady Gaga's "Shallow" played. Since I'm as shallow as a wading pool I knew it was kismet. The tantalizing dance of seduction could now begin. Staggering to my feet, she seemed miles away, not the twenty feet she actually was. I began walking unsteadily like Karloff's mummy of yore, stumbling and shuffling toward tonight's true love. My progress impeded by the so-called dancers. Weaving through them like Jack Torrance through a maze at the Overlook Hotel, my heart felt like a Ginger Baker frantic drum solo, palms sweatier than Trump's as he awaits legal advice from his court jester, Rudy Giuliani. My optimism waned as the watching bikers chanted, "dead woman walking."Taking a deep breath, I approached shaken and timid, extending my hand, "Hello. I'm Iris. I'm so lucky I'm not diabetic because you are the sweetest thang I've ever seen." (With a smooth line like that how can I possibly still be.
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