Obviously I was wrong - they were more, much more. Why had I not realized what my son was growing into? A man.My son was an adult and I could not find any words but felt hurt in my soul at the loss of what had been."Want to know something else mother?"There was more? I did not have time to say a word before he said in a rush, "The whole time I was with her I could not help but think of you!" It was said in such an accusatory way that I felt hurt as well as numb at the realization.Robert then pushed me from his room and slammed the door in my face.That was when it started. At first an embarrassment to the both of us, little was said. But within the next year it was I that changed and though Robert never openly spoke a word about his feelings toward me, I could see in his frequent gaze, the longing within.The first time I confronted myself was when I realized that I was jealous toward my son when he went out on dates. Dates that cumulated in sexual congress there was no doubt. Then. The "old biddy" (her words not mine) just adores all of the children and once they get to know her, they flock to her. She's become a combination babysitter, teacher, den mother and scout mistress. With the number of children on our island she suggested that we create something akin to the old campfire kids. She actually has them do things as a group. Some are nothing more than hikes around the island or swims in the lagoon, but she's managed to include some geology, marine biology, botany, camping, singing, acting and even wrestling. She's enlisted Larry as well as several of the mothers from the other households to assist. Just last night she asked if we would be able to organize an ocean fishing trip for the kids from ten to thirteen.Of course, part of the reason she does so much is that every other woman is pregnant. It's only been a few months, so none are unable to stand up and walk around, but Louisa is definitely more spry than most of the women right now. They appreciate her.
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