I watched Elaine move into her routine and the audience get into it. There were close to forty people in the audience and they were in the holiday spirit.ELAINE: We're back after the national day of mourning on Friday. That's right. Black Friday. I think it is fitting that we commemorate the day the stock market crashed on Friday, September 24, 1869, with this solemn holiday, the day after our most conspicuous gastronomic consumption of the year. I personally put on my little black dress, a veil, and black gloves. Black pumps—not too high because you don't want to show disrespect.And you might need to run.Then I went out and totally destroyed the department stores.I was in the thick of things. I clawed my way to the toy department and grabbed the very last of those Talkboys. You know, the personal tape recorder that cute kid in Home Alone used to fake his way through New York! I had to get one for... That's when I realized I don't have any children! I forgot!I handed the little toy. I stuck it in my mouthand prepared to light.She was staring at me, unbelieving. "What are you doing?"A memory flash in my mind. I smiled. "I belive liars go to the eighthlevel of hell." I mused for a moment. "I'm hoping for the seventh,myself." You're Crazy!" Yes," I said, laughing. "But I'm not insane."Her face contorted miserably. "You'll die, bastard" You'll die with me," I said, nonplussed."Fuck You!" she spat out combined blood and mucous. "Your as afraid todie as anybody else, YOU HEAR ME! I fantasized about you stuck in thatbody, unable to do anything. I loved every Minute! I WON! I WON I WON!"I smiled. Thought had degenerated into a murky pool of pain, but I feltgood somehow. Win, lose, what's the difference?My last thought came bubbling up. Two wrongs never made a right, but Ihoped, as in mathematics, that they at least balanced the equation. I flicked the wheel of the Bic.The world went to white. The blast blew shrapnel for hundreds of feet in the countryside. Soon,fires.
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