I firmly rejected the idea of reading online, knowing the effect it would have and made myself catch up on my accounts. Wanting a change I dug out a Cruxshadows CD and poured some more whisky. When the CD ended, I wove my way to bed – I don’t have a high tolerance for alcohol – and eventually fell asleep.Sunday morning ... and nothing to distract me. I had breakfast, made some sandwiches and set off for a long, long walk. The fresh air, the river, the wildlife ... sounds of sea-birds, boats on the river, calmed me. I ate my sandwiches sitting on the sea-defences, then called in at a pub in Waldringfield for a pint of beer. By the time I got home, I was ready to throw a meal together, have a bath and go to bed. I slept ... quite well.Monday, and a full day of work, replacing a fence; once more, a long soak in the bath, and a good night’s sleep.Tuesday, and one day to go ... but no work to distract me. Katryn would be doing some joinery during the morning and perhaps the early. Yes, been there and done that. Yes nerdy. And yes, pretend seen the world all bright eyed and bushy-fuckin’ tailed. But really, each peachy little Gillian out there has something unique and special about her. And if you watch very carefully, letting her weave her web day after day, you may just observe the predator trapped in her own snare. And then my dear reader… well actually, let me rather tell you a story. A story about the Gillian I knew, the Gillian we all know. I met her at a party. I was somewhat, shall we say, buzzed, and thus weighing my future in a maze of contemplation. I looked up and there she was – staring me down. ‘You’re all fucked up’ she said, ‘wasting your life away with that shit – you got no drive, no purpose.’ ‘Really, you don’t like to get a buzz?’ ‘Don’t need it’ she snapped, ‘I get high by myself, whenever I want to.’ ‘Really…?’ ‘Sure, like now, I’m flying, and all without that stuff!’ ‘Aahhh…’ I wasn’t exactly smitten by the little minx, all 20 years of.
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