It would have been so easy. Ben was the spontaneous, romantic type. For all his wonderful qualities, he wasn't the greatest at thinking five steps ahead (except between the sheets). He led with his heart, and sometimes that let him leap before he looked. I could have talked him into getting married a week after breaking up with Ryan, before starting our Junior Year. Nobody would have even questioned us. I was me. And he was him.But I wasn't me anymore. I wasn't even sure who "ME" was. The girl Ben fell in love with got corrupted somewhere along the way, and I had to find her again. I had to become Ben's soulmate once more.If that was what I still wanted.Did I?I closed my eyes and sighed. Seriously, dying in a fiery explosion would be sooo much simpler than this.The road trip with Gwen and Robin had given me some space. I'd spent the first part of the trip just trying to FORGET Ben, because to think of him was to remind myself of the evil slut I had become. Selfish actions had led to. . Good God!" She paled and stood stock still, gazing at my torso and ankles.I would like to have thought she was impressed with my toned and sexy body, but her expression was not of admiration but horror. She could see my scars. They were impressive in a ghoulish sort of way, though they had become less vivid with the passing years."They don't hurt any more, Viv. I'm so used to Trish seeing them I quite forgot they might shock you. Sorry." I'm the one who's sorry, Allan. How could anyone be so vicious?" Easily, it seems," I replied with a smile. "I'll go and cover up. Hardly appropriate behaviour, exhibiting my scars to a married woman!"It made her laugh and any awkwardness passed. She turned and went back to the living area where I joined her shortly afterwards, suitably dressed.Dinner was perfect as always, but I had to pay. Vivienne returned to matchmaking mode and it occasioned a repetition of the arguments we had at our previous meeting.She began innocuously. "So, Allan, what are.
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