He took three rolls of film, both black and white, and color. He took bothsides, front, sitting, standing, and a few with my Mother sitting next tome."They'll have your new pass and ID by tomorrow. Stop in and see me then."Since it was almost quitting time, we left, deciding to have dinner out."You know of course that a lot of the ladies in town, once they find outthat you're single, will be trying to fix you up with the right guy,usually a son or nephew or grandson. You better be prepared for that." Mom! I'm not that way!" Yes I know that, but they don't. They'll think that you are what you looklike. A beautiful young lady. There might even be times when you will needa male escort. Like the debutante ball at the country club for example."I sat there, pondering what was just said, knowing that since I had alreadycommitted to the role of female, and as long as the column ran, I wouldhave to be Rita. Mom saw my shoulders slump."You can pretend to pout about this all you want to Rita,. She told him that he needed it more than she did and gave it tohim as part of the divorce proceedings. He stared numbly into the mirrorat the sea of mascara that had been unleashed upon his cheeks and wonderedhow it had all come to this.He stared down at the small leather case in front of him. It contained arevolver that had been his father's. The weapon had come to him as part ofhis inheritance. He carefully opened the case and picked up the gun ashe'd done so many times before. It was heavy, cold, and black. Laughterescaped as he realized he'd never fired a weapon before. Would he have theguts to do it this time?He slowly raised it to his mouth and wrapped his lips around the barrel.The cold steel almost felt comforting in his mouth. Gazing into the mirrorwith wonder, he almost couldn't believe that it was himself that he wasseeing. Though this wasn't the first time he'd performed this task, ithadn't as yet achieved ritual status.Three years ago he was a relatively happily married.
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